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Friday, March 8, 2013

Bed Sharing Adventures: My Little Bed Hog!

Before Ramya came home, we decided that if she would be ok with sharing our room with us, we would have her sleep close for a while.  We never really decided if it would be in our bed or on a little bed in our room, but figured she'd make that choice herself, depending on how she did.  Co-sleeping (having your little one sleep in your room (in their own bed is fine or in yours)) is encouraged in adoption (at least in our experience).  Our adoption agency recommends that you keep your child near for a little while.  This helps reassure your little one that you are close and helps them see that you will meet their needs both day and night.  Many kiddos have night terrors and wake often as well, so it's reassuring for them to have someone close.  Not to mention that it's easier to calm them quickly, while getting a little more sleep yourself.  Additionally, kiddos from orphanages are often used to sharing a room with other kids, so they are not used to sleeping alone.  It helps with bonding and attachment too, so we figured, hey, why not!?!?!  It seemed like a good idea to us, and we are on the same page, so we went for it.

For us, sharing a sleeping space with our children is nothing new.  We started out our parenting journey sure that Conner would sleep in a pack-and-play in our room and then would seamlessly transfer to a crib in his own room by 6 months.  Little did we know this was not going to work out too well ;).  Conner had very bad reflux and was never happy unless he was on or next to me.  I tried, night after night, to keep him happy and sleeping in his pack-and-play.  This, of course, meant I wasn't sleeping.  One night, David said, "just bring him to our bed and get some sleep!".  It worked like a charm and we never looked back!  With Madi and her surgeries and higher risk of something happening due to possibly shunt failure (which we had twice), I never felt comfortable having her away from me.  The only way I could sleep sound was if she was sleeping close.  We made sure to be safe and careful about it, but this began our journey of co-sleeping (more specifically, bed-sharing for us).

In India, Ramya had to share a bed with me, because there was only one bed.  Once we got home, she seemed to want a toddler bed (Madi and Conner have one), so we got a free one from a friend and set it up for her right next to my side of the bed.  Turns out she wanted a toddler bed to look at, but not so much to sleep in ;).  So, for now, she sleeps next to David and me (though really, she scoots over next to me), and we are totally ok with that!  The only thing that would be nice is if that girl slept at least sorta straight in bed (see below photos) ;).

You see this picture?  This is us cuddling on our first night out of the orphanage...

I remember thinking that she laid so straight and still.  I'm not sure exactly what happened, because that is not how she sleeps any more!  Last week Conner and Madi convinced me to let them sleep in the "big bed" with me and Ramya (David had to camp out in a different room, but he didn't mind one bit, since it's not what we normally do).  Conner said Ramya kept kicking him in the head.  I thought he was just being silly, until I saw this (the pillow is saving my spot in bed :))....
You see those legs in a nice little "V"?  Yup, that is mostly how she sleeps next to David and I now.  It's either an "L" or a "V", but really never straight any more!  She's a squirrel!
The other night Madi had a cold so I put her in our bed for two nights as well.  Both nights, when I went to go to bed, this is what I found, even though I did not leave them that way...
She loves to be close and cuddle!  She does wake up sometimes at night, but after she feels for me, she goes right back to bed.  It may not be perfect, but I think it's really helping her feel more comfortable there, and it's working well for us.  The snuggles are nice too, and I do think it helps with bonding.  There is also just something special about seeing your little one's sweet, innocent, and angelic sleeping face next to you.  It sure makes whatever happens during the day a little easier to deal with!
So, for now, we share a bed with a very sweet ninja who loves to cuddle!



1 comment:

Jill said...

That's ADORABLE!! And hilarious that she's so piked!