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Wednesday, May 29, 2013

A Big Announcement

(Please read the bottom of this post for updates)


I have a big announcement to make, and this may take me a while, so sit back, grab some popcorn, put your feet up, and know that if you are reading this, we appreciate you and all the support that you have given us!


We are [paper] pregnant [again].



Whew, it feels good to get that out!  It's been something that we have been holding inside for a while now, and today, my birthday, feels like the perfect day to share.

You see, there are two girls in India that stole our hearts.  One, we spent one week short of two years trying to bring home.  We prayed for her, cried for her, fought for her, and felt emptiness in our hearts until we could bring her home.  The moment we saw her, we knew she was meant to be ours. Now, she is home, after what seems like an eternity of waiting.  She gets held close, hugged, rocked, kissed, and told that she is loved.  The other was unexpected for us.  We didn't think we would fall in love so quickly again.  It breaks our hearts knowing she is in a crib, alone, waiting and wondering when someone will come for her.  Well, sweet girl, we are coming.

You may remember me posting about a sweet girl in India named Deena.  Deena is Ramya's best friend from her third orphanage in Bangalore.  She is a beautiful and loving 5 year old girl who wants a family so very badly.  You may have heard me say that Deena needed a family and I may have begged you to make her part of yours.  But what I was really yelling is that God was putting Deena in our hearts, and it felt too big to wrap our minds around right now, so I was looking for a way around what we were feeling called to do.

Sigh.  It just never works out like that, I'm not sure why I haven't learned my lesson. 

Ever since coming home from India, I couldn't get Deena out of my mind.  I kept thinking about her was and feeling very strongly that we had a role in her life, though I wasn't exactly sure what it was.  Then I put together the slide show for Ramya's welcome party and  I started to understand what our role was, but hadn't quite put words to my thoughts yet.  I was watching the slide show with the kids the day before our adoption party and when Deena's photo came on, Conner looked at me and said, "Momma, we need to go bring Ramya's best friend, Deena, home.  We need to adopt her.".  This is coming from the boy who insisted that we were going back to India to adopt a brother for him.  I told him I didn't know, that it wasn't that easy, and that it would be a big deal.  He told me that it was ok, it's just what we needed to do.  I love that boy and his big heart.  He put to words what I had been thinking all that time.  I kind of shoved the thought to the back of my mind and went about our days.  She kept coming back up to the front of my mind, though. I started talking with David about what was in my heart, and he said he felt that we needed to adopt her as well.  We both agreed it was crazy and that we were nuts, but both felt strongly that we needed to try.  We weren't quite ready to commit, so decided to pray about it, but really, we already knew where God was leading us. 

The next couple of weeks were a tizzy.  I had emailed an online friend who had brought their little guy home from the orphanage just a few weeks after we brought Ramya home.  I told her what we were thinking and she told me she had actually considered adopting Deena.  She had copies of her medical files that were outdated, but she said she would send them to us.  I knew Deena had a disability, but I wasn't sure what it was.  It turns out that Deena has osteogenisis imperfecta (OI), level 4, otherwise known as "Brittle Bone Disease". 

To be quite honest with you, this is where I freaked out a little.  I mean, I know spina bifida.  You tell me I am supposed to adopt a kiddo with spina bifida, and I'd say, perfect!  Great!  Spina bifida? I know just what to do!  But osteogenisis imperfecta?  What was that?  I read online and it sounded big and scary.  But then I remembered that once spina bifida sounded big and scary to us too.  After having Madi, we realized it's not.  It's just a small part of our life and hers. 

We started talking to parents to try and see what daily life would look like for Deena.  We searched for local families we could talk to.  I prayed and told God that if this was going to happen, I needed a specialist locally that could help her, as well as local families to talk with.  After talking with parents that had OI and/or children with OI, I determined that the biggest things for her would be a good orthopedic surgeon and good therapists.  We already have amazing therapists who do in-home therapy, so we are all set there.  All we have to do is take it from 2 hours of therapy twice a week (Madi and Ramya both get 1 hour of PT and 1 hour of OT a week) to 3 hours of therapy twice a week.  Because we have in-home therapy, this really isn't too bad.  I e-mailed Dr. Segal, our orthopedic surgeon, and sent him Deena's medical files.  I asked him if he would be able to help her and told him that OI sounds big and scary to me.  He told me a little about how we would treat her when we brought her home, said that he was confident he could help her and provide the care she needs, and told me he would put me in touch with local families so that it wouldn't feel scary to me.  So just like that, in one e-mail, my prayers were answered!

I'm not going to lie.  The thought of having another child in our home that needs pretty significant medical care frightens me a bit.  Things feel so incredibly busy right now, and I constantly feel like I'm sinking and just can't ever catch up.  I mean, seriously, I've had some framed photos sitting on my desk for over a month, waiting to get hung up, and I still haven't done it, because that's how far behind I am.  Last week I realized I hadn't balanced my check book in over a month.  I've had phone calls to make for weeks that haven't been made.  I've had things to organize for months that haven't been organized.  Ramya's adoption book is still sitting there half done.  I have bills to pay, we have appointments coming up, and there is just so much more.   Then I think about the added doctors appointments, hospital stays, surgeries, medical bills, medical insurance premiums, and my head starts to spin a little.

Then I stopped, and I thought about how things felt the last time we decided to adopt.  Madi was only 2, Conner was 4.  Things felt busy and crazy and I couldn't believe I was thinking of adding to that.  Madi wasn't very independent yet and I felt like trying to care for another child with special needs would be too huge for me.  When I stopped to think about life in two years, though, with Madi being 4 and Conner being 6, it felt like something that we could do.  That is basically how it feels again.  I have checked with WACAP, and another adoption would mean starting ALL of the paperwork over again.  We have to have the same amount of money (last time it was about $35,000) again.  It would also mean another 1 1/2 to 2 year wait.  By then, hopefully the girls will be stable medically, our appointments will have calmed back down, Ramya will have attached and will be adjusted, and life will look very different.  It would be wonderful if this adoption did not take as long, but it looks like the chances are good it will. 

Some things have changed in India, and we will need your prayers for sure.  Because of new CARA guidelines, you can no longer pre-match with a child, which is what we did with Ramya, since we found her first and then started our paperwork.  What this means for us is that we are going in to this with no guarantee that we can actually adopt Deena.  WACAP is supportive of this adoption and wants to make it happen.  They usually don't approve families to go back and adopt again so quickly, but they are willing to let us start the paperwork and process now.  The orphanage is supportive of our adoption and wants to make it happen as well.  They are both going to work as hard as they can to help us bring Deena home, but we may go through all of the paperwork, cost, homestudies, etc... only to find out that we cannot actually adopt Deena.  Let's just pray that doesn't happen!

So that's that!  We know we are crazy and we know this won't be easy, but we are excited (and slightly nervous ;)) to start the process to bring Deena home.  We feel strongly that God is directing us down this path, and we feel confident knowing that He is walking along side us.




Starting the adoption process again (and hearts at peace!)... http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2014/08/our-big-announcements-finally.html


Officially Matched!


We have US approval...


Dossier is almost done...


 Dossier sent...


Approved In-State and Article 5....


 NOC was issued...


Video of telling Ramya who we are adopting...


We had our first big court date...


Chatting with Deena for the first time...


Written orders received...

Passport is ready for pickup...
http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2015/12/too-big-not-to-share-tonight.html


Flights are booked...



God is with us always....



We are in India...


She's in my arms....


Exit permit in hand...
http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2016/01/exit-permit-is-in-hand.html


Headed home....
http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2016/01/whew-almost-home-what-adventure.html

Deena turns 8...
http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2016/01/happy-birthday-deena.html

Video of David and the Girls meeting Deena...
http://www.aworthyjourney.com/2016/01/finally-video-and-update.html

7 comments:

ksivey said...

This is such wonderful and HUGE news! Thank you for sharing this with all of us. Our prayers are with you and with ALL of your children as you work to bring your family together.

ainemc said...

Wow, amazing!!

Lauren Head said...

Thank you for sharing your real and honest feelings! It is hard to be a mom in any capacity...but to follow God in adopting His children from India...WOW! So encouraging to see brothers and sisters in Christ who are willing to die to themselves to accomplish His work! Just Awesome, Jamie :)

Unknown said...

I hope and pray Deena can be matched with your family.

mc said...

I'm so very happy for you!! Congratulations! I look forward to following along on this journey:)

Claire from the Calico Corner said...

Wow, I'm so excited for you!! How amazingly wonderful. What a blessing your family is!! I'm praying for you as you bring sweet Deena home, and you'll have to post if you have any local fundraisers!!

sabrina singh said...

God please. Bless this wonderful family who is really supportive and theres not too many kind of families like this that give their time love dedication money and energy also i think ramya. Would also be very glad to have her bestfriend with her god do me the favor to this wonderful family