One Week Home

Whew!  This week has seriously flown by.  I can proudly say my luggage is all put away and I am mostly caught up on laundry.  Right now that feels like a pretty big accomplishment!   

When we adopted Ramya we had so much support in the way of help with the house every-other-week and meals every-other-day.  This time David had to go back to work the day after we returned from India and we aren't very connected in Tucson yet so life picked right back up very quickly.  We did have a few dinner gift cards to use, though, so we were able to order carryout a few nights, which helped.

Deena is adjusting really well and keeps us laughing.  She hates the bird and does not want it close to her, so that can be interesting, but I think eventually she will decide the bird is fun.  She mostly wants to be held or sit on my lap.  She likes me to be constantly within view and if I walk out of view I hear, "mommmmmmyyyyyyyy where arrrrrre yooooouuu".  I know the security is really important for her right now so I try to just stay close or take her with me if I need to leave the room. 

The other 3 kiddos are enjoying having Deena home.  Madi is constantly telling her that she's her best friend.  Deena and Conner really bonded in India and love playing together.  Conner told me that he thought he wanted a brother, but he's glad we adopted Deena and that he has another sister.  He's such a sweet boy and is so gentle and loving with her.  Ramya enjoys playing with her and enjoys having her home but is struggling the most with the change.  In general, I think Ramya just really struggles with her confidence and knowing who she is in this world, but obviously any time we go through change it spirals her again.  I see this divide with Ramya between what she defaults to and what she wants to be.  She wants affection, but pushes us away, sometimes quite literally.  It's like the desire is there but there's a divide and she just can't put that guard down.  She defaults to harsh words and intentionally pushing buttons, but seems like she doesn't want to act like that and knows it's not right.  She can be so very sweet too and I'm thankful for those moments. Any time there's change she stops wanting to eat again and uses food for control, even though she will say she is hungry and she likes the food.  I know she's had a lot of hurt in the past and I pray that one day she will be able to let herself fully feel love and joy; let herself see how special she is.  It breaks my heart that she is only 9 and doesn't have that childhood innocence.  No child should ever have to grow up feeling unloved or unworthy.  It saddens me that there are so many other children out there feeling that way.  For now we have been trying to give her extra love and time and have been talking a lot about how we will always love her, and how our hearts grow bigger to love Deena too, but that it doesn't change how we feel about her.  David took her out shopping with him today and I know she enjoyed her time alone with him.

 

 

 

 

Deena still prefers me but is warming up to David as well.  She asked him to hold her a few times this week and tonight she went over and cuddled with him.  She even gave him a few kisses and told him that she loves him.  It melts my heart to see them together!

 

 

 

Today we went shopping for some new pants for Deena.  I wasn't anticipating her coming home with a cast on, so many of the pants I had do not fit correctly right now.  I had some Gymboree bucks and was able to get her some new size 4T leggings with wider bottoms that will fit over her cast.  She did pretty well at the store and enjoyed running in to Bare Minerals with me because she got to put on some pink lipstick.  She also found a pair of sunglasses at Gymboree and was very excited!

 

 

 

Of course she's mastered the art of the selfie and my phone will never be the same again.  She loves taking pictures of herself!

 







Next week we start homeschooling and I think she will do well.  She is very bright!  This week we did a few science experiments from a kit the kids got as a gift for Christmas and she is enjoying them. 

Please be praying we can get her on our insurance before her first orthopedic surgeon appointment next month.  We need to start PAM infusions with her and she may need some rodding surgeries in her near future as well.  She also handed me a piece of her tooth the other day so I need to get her to the dentist ASAP.  We have some big expenses coming up and it would be really helpful to have her on our insurance!

A big "thank you" to everyone who has been praying for us and following our journey.  It really  means so much! 


 

Our Two Year Adopton Celebration

Can you believe today marks two years since Ramya has been home?  It is just so crazy!  It really feels like she has always been part of our family, but it's crazy to think that just two years ago I was in India, holding her for the first time, and walking out those doors with her. 

(P.S. When I walked out the doors with her, it was the 6th in India, but the 7th in the US, so we use the 7th as her adoption day)

 



 

 

 

When I think back to those first moments I had with her, I am still completely overcome with emotion.  I would have never in my wildest dreams thought I would have a daughter from India.  Before Ramya fell in our laps, I did not even know you could adopt from India, nor had I ever even considered it.  I also thought we would adopt a baby and was pretty sure we were not meant to adopt an older child.  Yet here we are with our beautiful, almost 8 year old, daughter from the other side of the world.  It's crazy and perfect all at the same time.  I'm still in awe at how God orchestrated our journey. 

 

There's so much I could say about adoption and our process of becoming a family of five.  Adoption is crazy hard, but at the same time, adoption is beautiful.   

 

Before adopting you read so much about helping your child attach to you, but really attachment is a two-way street.  You think and pray and prepare.  You read every book, every blog, and every article you can get your hands on.  Then this little (or big, but still little on the inside) human comes in to your life.  You love that little human intensely.  They want to love you, but they are terrified of you.  Everyone else in their life has left them.  They are sure you will do the same.  The more they want to love you and want to accept your love, the more they push you away.  All the while, you are trying to attach to them too.  You know you love them, but you never got to start with those "warm fuzzies".  When they scream at you, try to head-butt you, , throw things at you, take off their clothes and chuck them at you, and scream that they don't like you, it's hard.  The struggles are real.  Sometimes they seem endless.  You know beyond a shadow of a doubt you love them.  You know and feel that they are yours with every bone in your body.  You know you would do anything for your child.  But in that moment, when it's all happening and you are still trying to create those warm fuzzies, it's hard.  Just plain hard.  Even if you had a whole stock-house of warm-fuzzies it would still be hard.

 

Then you get those moments that fill your heart with joy.  The quiet "I love you".  The little hand in your hand.  That little head against your shoulder, snuggling in deep.  It may not last long, but it's a glimmer.  A glimmer of hope.  A little more bonding.  A little more closeness.  A little more attaching.  It may not last long, but you soak it in and it sustains you.

 

It is such a blessing to get to adopt.  When you adopt, you have the privilege of seeing the world a little differently.  You get to see this little being come out of their shell, slowly.  You get to see their personality emerge.  You start to see confidence.  You see smiles turn authentic and hearts begin to soften.  You start to see genuine joy.  The "I love you" becomes real and heart-felt.  And that, my friends, makes it all worth it.  Yes, adoption is hard.  Yes, adoption is crazy emotional.  But, yes, adoption is worth it.

 

 

 

Today we celebrated Ramya's adoption day how we always do.  It's nothing fancy, but it's special to us.  We go out to Indian food and wear our finest India outfits.  We watch our adoption video and cuddle close while we read through Ramya's adoption story book together.  We spend time as a family enjoying each other's company and remember that love makes a family, and our family is full of love.

 

 

 

 

“I didn’t give you the gift of life,
But in my heart I know.
The love I feel is deep and real,
As if it had been so.
For us to have each other
Is like a dream come true!
No, I didn’t give you
The gift of life,
Life gave me the gift of you.”
-Unknown



 

 

3 out of 4 down and a nice embarrasing moment...

Today we had #3 out of our 4 appointments this week.  Today was Ramya's turn and we went to see Dr. Segal, our orthopedic surgeon, out of PCH.  Our appointment was at 10:45 and we made it up there just about on the dot.  I had made an x-ray appointment for Ramya at 12:00, hoping to be done by then.  Ramya needed an x-ray of her bowels and also one of her left hand to check for age.  They just want to make sure her age and bone growth/development are in sync.  At 12:00, we still hadn't seen the doctor, so I found a nurse and had them call down to x-ray to let them know we would be late.  We saw the doctor at about 12:15 and he had 3 students with him.  He said he was teaching the students about spina bifida, and I told him, "Great!  You get two kiddos for the price of one today!".  The kiddos were getting quite restless after a long wait, so Dr. Segal did some magic tricks for them.  They really enjoyed them and it helped put them in a better mood.  He's always great with them and I really appreciate it!  He's a wonderful doctor and even came by just to say "hi" to Madi when we were in the hospital for her vesicostomy, even though he didn't have to.  I love and appreciate that he sees my children for the amazing little blessings they are, and not just for their diagnosis.  He showed me Ramya's hip x-ray and told me both her hips are displaced.  They aren't totally out of socket, however, her sockets are not carved out correctly, so they sort of pop in and out.  When he was showing us the x-ray photos, there was a heart on one of them, because they use a little heart-shaped blocker that says, "save the gonads" so the radiation goes around a kiddos reproductive area.  Anyhow, Madi was very fascinated with the heart and thought it was really Ramya's heart.  I explained to her that a real heart doesn't look like that and would be in a different spot.  I told her it was just a sticker, but then she thought that they put he sticker IN Ramya.  After explaining that it had just gone on the outside, and that they had already taken it off, Madi decided to yell that Ramya had a penis.  We then got to have the talk, again, about Ramya being a girl and not having a penis...  in front of the doctor and the students.  They were really trying not to giggle.  Fun fun!  Dr. Segal said we need to keep watching her hips, but that we aren't going to talk about surgery for them at this time.  Next we headed down stairs for x-rays.

After checking in with radiology we took a brief a potty break then got Ramya's x-rays done, which didn't take too long.  We were done by about 1:15.  We headed over to the cafeteria next, as the girls decided they didn't like the snacks I had brought and everyone was starving.  My kids LOVE to go to the cafeteria and order food.  And by love, I mean LOVE.  They look forward to those little trips and it really brightens our otherwise not so fun days.  They offer gluten-free pizza and pasta, as well as other things they really enjoy.  Unfortunately we didn't have a great cafeteria experience, but in the end, the kids had full happy bellies, and that is what counts.  In a nutshell, the guy running the pizza/pasta area reallllly didn't want to make our pizza, as he was busy (which is understandable), but at 1:45, he still hadn't even started our pizza and my kids had, quite literally, been standing in the same spot waiting for about 25 minutes.  He just kept putting us off.  I asked to talk to a manager and he was wonderful.  He got our pizzas started for us and even gave us two free meal tickets.  He really was a nice guy.  I tried to explain to him that we come to the hospital very, very often and that it's not a lot of fun for my kiddos, but that their gluten-free pizza is a like a little ray of sunshine for them (I'm not exaggerating either, it really is.  They get so excited for it.  Conner even chose to come with me to the hospital so he could chose food from the cafeteria instead of going to hang out with Grammy, whom he loves, because it's just that exciting for him).    I told him I expect to wait a little longer, because it's a speciality item that they offer, but that if they are going to offer it, they really should be prepared to make it.  I thanked him for offering it and told him how much we love having that option available and how much it means to the kiddos.  Finally at about 2:10 our food was ready and we got to sit down to eat.  The kids were very very happy and scarfed down their food!  Conner looked at me and said, "Momma, thank you for telling that man to please make our pizza.  I was really hungry and I wanted it so bad.  I was so glad you said that".  Hearing that made it all worth while!

We finally made it home at 3:30, and it felt great to sit down and relax for a bit!  We had left at 10 a.m., and it was a long day for just one appointment and some x-rays.  I really didn't anticipate us being gone so long! 

When we were at Dr. Segal's office, we met a cute little boy with osteogenisis imperfecta 3 (OI3).  This, of course, made me think of Deena, which, of course, reminded me how much I dislike this long process, which reminded me of how much longer we have to go to get her home, which then reminded me that I haven't updated about our process!  Right now I don't have much to tell.  We are working on homestudies and are getting things done as fast as possible.  We basically have to re-do everything, which is a lot.  That's about all of the update I have for now, unfortunately.

I thought I'd share a few little adoption attachment updates.  The other day Madi was talking to Ramya.  She said, "Ramya, I really miss-ed you when you were in India.  I really wanted you to come home.  But now (long pause) I want you to go back to India."   Ramya very seriously and with emotion said that she didn't want to go back to India, which was nice to hear.  It was a good opportunity to talk with the girls about how Ramya part of our family, forever, and she is never going back.  Ramya is forever my daughter, they are forever sisters, etc...  I think it's a good thing for Ramya to hear and be reminded of how much we love her and how, no matter what, she is ours, forever.  I know that all of her last placements have been temporary, but I really want her to see that this isn't just another transition; this is it.  Tonight the girls were taking a bath and Ramya put all of the alligator bath toys in a bucket.  She said, "look, this is a family!"  It made me smile and it was a good ending to our day!

That's about all the updates I have for now.  Tomorrow we head back to PCH to see our urologist and check on Madi's vesicostomy.  After that we head to Flagstaff to  my parent's cabin for a few days.  We are all so excited and can't wait!!

Busy, busy, busy (did I say busy?!?!?!?!?)

Life has been busy, but good!  This is Madi's last week of preschool for the year.  She will have one more year after this, then she will homeschool with Conner and Ramya.  We have about 3 weeks left of homeschooling, then will do only partial summer days.  My goal is to do a lot of fun experiments and the such this summer. 

Last week we picked up Ramya's first pair of KAFOs and she is very, very proud of them!  Ron, our go-to-guy that we love at Hanger, made them for her with love!

 

 

When we picked up her new leg braces, we dropped of Madi's HKFOs, which were not fitting well again (that girl won't stop growing!!!).  After Madi's neurology appointment (more to come on that in a second) today, we picked up her HKFOs, so now both the girls have properly-fitting leg braces.  Double the trouble around here!  Ramya's strength and energy is low still, so we are slowly working on building up.  Today she spent about 30 minutes in the learning tower with them on "helping" me make dinner, which is the longest she's gone yet!!  She did start twisting her legs and buckling from her muscles getting tired, but she really made it a long time!  We've still only gotten about 5 minutes in the walker, but I know every day she will get stronger and stronger!

 

 

Last week (or maybe the week before... time just blurs together right now!), all the kiddos got their teeth cleaned.  I had Conner and Madi go first so Ramya could watch, then it was Ramya's turn.  We held hands and she did great!  None of the kids have cavities... YEAH!

 

 

(conner took this one :))

 

 

 

Today was neurology for Madi.  She is going to try a new seizure medication, since the Trileptal doesn't seem to be keeping her seizures away.  We are hoping this one will do the trick for her.  I just hate, hate, hate that she has them!  And, of course, I feel bad for letting her get the MMR vaccine, since they didn't start until she got it.  I was just really wanting us all to get to go to India together, but that is not how things were meant to be.  I know that may not be the reason she started getting them, but it's just quite a coincidence that she had never once in her life had a seizure until she got the vaccine, and then 4 days later, she started and hasn't stopped.  The CDC website lists ongoing seizures as a "rare" side effect of the vaccine.  Considering she's already neurologically challenged, I think the vaccine was enough to tip her over the edge and begin the seizures.  Anyhow, hopefully this new medication will do the trick and we can get her seizures under control.  She was stuttering quite a bit more after our last big cluster of seizures and hospital stay, but that seems to have gone down again, thank God!  She is still coughing a lot more randomly and has thrown up randomly quite a bit more.  They are hoping the medication change will fix this, but if not, she may need a swallow study to make sure she's not aspirating on her food.  The pediatrician also wanted to get an MRI, due to the continuation of seizures, but the neurologist does not think it's necessary, so we shall see what we do there.

 

Next Tuesday Madi goes in for a VCUG, a renal ulrasound, and then gets to pick up her new wheelchair.  Then, the following week, Ramya needs an exploratory surgery to see what is going on with her urinary system, figure out what and how they did surgery in India, and try and clean up her granulation tissue on her belly button that itches her all the time.  He'll also try to figure out if her muscles are tight enough, or if bulking her up will help keep her urine from leaking out.  Her bladder holds a decent amount, but she leaks very easily, so he thinks it may be a muscle tightness issue.

 

Attachment is going well.  Ramya seems to be getting more confident.  Her fine motor skills and coordination is getting better, and her English is coming along very well!  She wants to be held a decent amount, but also loves to be independent and play.  She loves getting and giving hugs and kisses, and we probably hear "I love you" about 20 times a day, which is wonderful!  We are a very affectionate family, so she hears it often as well :).  We are working on telling the truth and getting attention appropriately/ in appropraite amounts/ at appropriate times, etc..  We are playing games (thanks Amy for the suggestion!) to work on taking turns and waiting our turn.  We are also really trying to teach both Ramya and Madi about strangers.  They both think it's ok to touch and talk to anyone they see.  Madi will ask random strangers for hugs, and Ramya will try and get attention and will touch anyone close to her.  I think I'm going to have to be tougher and firmer with the girls to help them get it.  I really think either would just go with a random stranger if they were asked, which is not ok at all! 

 





I think that's it for now!  Please keep the girls in your prayers as they go through testing, and as Ramya has surgery.  We'll have a busy few weeks, but I am thankful that the girls are followed so closely and get such great medical care!!  I am also thankful that, amongst it all, God gives us many moments of peace and laughter. 

A Life Update... Urology, UTIs, Attachment, and More!

I have no good title for this post, because it's going to be a hodgepodge of updates :).

First off, I talked to the urologist and because Madi is non-symptomatic for a UTI, he doesn't want to treat her.  I have learned over the years that you don't start antibiotics unless the urologist thinks you need to. Doctors and hospitals look for signs of infection often times without taking cathing, and the bacteria introduced there, in to account. There have been numerous times we were told to treat her UTI and then her urologist reviewed the results and said not to.  I figured as much, which is why I didn't fill the antibiotic prescription the hospital gave us when we are in on Friday after the seizure/headache/projectile vomiting from Madi. And on that topic, I really, honestly, just believe her getting better was a miracle.  Once when Madi was a baby, we'd gone through heck with her shunt.  We had an infection just a few weeks after we were out from the hospital that landed us back in the hospital for almost 3 weeks.  That cleared and the new shunt clogged.  That was another 3 day stay for them to revise it.  About two weeks later, Madi was showing signs of shunt failure again.  I took her in, Dr. Moss checked her shunt, and he said that it was definitely not working again and would need to be revised again.  We spent the night and Madi went NPO for surgery in the morning.  The morning came and revision time came, but when Dr. Moss checked her shunt (as he always does before surgery), it was working again, so we got to go home.  I really think that's what happened this time too.  Madi was so very miserable.  She had the seizure, she didn't want to open her eyes, she kept holding her head saying it hurt, she was projectile vomiting, and she kept drifting in and out.  Right before the CT scan, it was as if a light switch was thrown.  All of a sudden, she was her normal happy self.  It was crazy!  I really believe God cleared that shunt for us!


Today we headed back down to Phoenix Children's Hospital.  We were there twice last week (once for each girl) and will be there twice this week (for Ramya).  We are nearing the end of the testing she will need done (for now) and I can't wait!  PCH is an amazing hospital, and we are very thankful for the care they have given our girls, but I am growing weary of the 30-40 minute drive a few times a week, and the number of hours we spend there.  Today Ramya had a VCUG to check and see if Ramya still has renal reflux.  The good news is that it does not look like she does!  YES!  That means the surgery (well, half-surgery ;)) she had in India was not a complete waste.  It did correct her renal reflux.  That is awesome!  The test also showed that she did not have the augmentation surgery when they did her mitrofanoff surgery, which is a bummer.  If Ramya is going to be "socially continent", it's a surgery she will need.  It's not a fun one, and it is usually done with the mitrofanoff surgery, so it's too bad that it will mean another surgery.  Boo.  I am very thankful that when and if the time comes for that surgery, though, that I will be able to be with her and make sure she is comfortable and well cared for.  That is something worth celebrating for sure.  My little girl will never go through surgery alone again!


On Friday, Ramya and I head back to PCH for a urodynamics test that will give us a better picture of how much fluid Ramya's bladder can hold, if it is rigid or spastic, and how quickly it leaks.  After the test, we will see the urologist to go over our recent testing and get a better picture of what we need to do.  We know she may need the augmentation surgery, we need to deal with her granulation tissue on her belly button that is driving her nuts, and that the MACE procedure she had done in India isn't looking right (placed right) and needs to looked reviewed as well.

Attachment is chugging along.  I still hold Ramya quite a bit, though much less than in the beginning.  She still prefers to sit on my lap and have me feed her, so thatly is something we do most of the time.  She also still prefers to be rocked to sleep and sleep in our bed, so that's what we do!  I have been tired lately (and seriously need to go to bed now) and haven't been as cheerful and full of life with the kiddos lately and I need to get myself caught back up on sleep.  Thank God for coffee!

Ramya's time-ins and times where she just gets in a funky and can't get out of it have been decreasing, which is nice, though they can still be pretty intense.  Yesterday we had a melt-down that lead to a time-in.  She was very upset and yelling at me and told me "me no like you, momma!!".  I wasn't sure if I should laugh or cry.  I told her I'm sorry she feels like that, but I still love her very much.  She wasn't too fond of that answer, but it's the truth :).  I know she was just upset at me for enforcing rules she didn't want to follow, and I know that she does enjoy spending time with me, but it still made my heart a bit sad to hear those words.

Ramya's English is getting better.  She is understanding more and more every day and is expressing herself more and more.  She has just discovered a love for salad and asks for "tiny bites" of mine all the time.  She still loves eating beans and meat, and could eat them all day long!  She's also discovered a love for peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, which is really nice since it's a snack I can easily bring when we are on the go.


 I'll be back later to update with Easter pictures. All the kiddos loved Easter.  Conner told me that in Church he learned that Easter isn't about eggs and candy.  It's about Jesus dying on the cross for us because he loves us so much.  He talked a little about what exactly that meant too.   I was quite proud of him for expressing what he learned (we had talked about it at home as well, but I wasn't sure if anything sunk in), though he still woofed down the candy and was giddy about the egg hunt ;).  Madi loved the hunt but wanted nothing to do with any of the candy.  Ramya loved the hunt, loved the boiled eggs, and thinks the purple jelly beans are pretty nice as well. 


I think I about covered it all for now!  I'll be back with photos and more urology updates soon!
 

Seizures, Sickies, A Mini Hospital Stay, X-Rays, CT-Scans, Orthopedic Surgeons, OH MY! Oh Wait! Did I Mention Maybe a UTI?

Whew.

I know, that's quite the title for this blog post, but it's been quite a few crazy days!

Where to start???

Wednesday we went out for our "big" shopping trip.  We found out Madi is sensitive to peanuts, almonds, eggs, corn, and wheat (likely dairy too, but she didn't have enough in her system for it to show up).  We knew about gluten and dairy, but the rest are new (and were tested because of her big egg fiasco).  We had to re-do the pantry, again, to make it allergen-friendly for her.  That meant sunflower nut butter (instead of almond or peanut), coconut milk (instead of almond), rice noodles (instead of quinoa/corn blend), etc...  I was also very low on groceries as we've just been kind of sliding by with our shopping and needed to stock up.  That was a $300 shopping trip right there.  Whew.  Yes.  $300.  I've never spent that kind of money in a grocery store, ever.  It was insane.  We were blessed with a sprouts gift card by two amazing friends the week before, and let me tell you, it was very much appreciated!  It helped a lot with that trip.  It was such a blessing (thank you friends (you know who you are), we love you guys!!) to have!!

I got a call from a friend as we were leaving the grocery store.  She needed to take her husband in to the hospital for heart failure (Thank God he is doing ok now.  It looks as though a virus settled in to his heart and was causing issues, but is resolving).  I ran by to grab her two kiddos and brought them back to our house.  Next, my friends moving to India the next day came by for dinner.  It was a crazy last dinner with them, as there were 7 kiddos at that point in time (my 3, their 2, and my friend's 2), but we enjoyed seeing them one last time before they left for India.  I got my 3 ready for bed and laid them down with David and sat with/rocked the 2 we were watching so that they would rest and be happy until their momma could make it home. They are sweet kiddos and did a great job while their mom was away.  I dropped them off at around 11:30, got home around 12:45 (we chatted a bit), then crashed in to bed.

Thursday I woke up and got Conner, Ramya, and Madi ready for a doctor's appointment we had at 10:00 am.  Ramya was seeing Dr. Segal, our orthopedic surgeon, for a check-up and to get a prescription for leg braces.  I got the three of them pottied, fed, dressed, and in the car, and we headed for Phoenix Children's Hospital (PCH).  We checked in, waited, got in the room, waited a bit more, then saw Dr. Segal.  He is a wonderful doctor and we really love him.  He heard clicking in Ramya's left hip and set us for x-rays.  Conner and Madi couldn't go in the x-ray room, so I took Ramya in while the secretary played with Conner and Madi.  She made them glove-balloons and they drew faces on them.  They had a blast!  We got back to the room and by then everyone was getting ansy.  We waited a bit more for the doctor to come back, and he walked in to a room of monkeys when he did!  He gave Conner a game on his phone, sat Madi on his lap so she could scribble all over his notes, and finished his exam (like I said, he's an amazing doctor!).  We were finally finished at about 12:45 pm.  Dr. Segal wrote us a prescription for occupational therapy, physical therapy, speech therapy (just in case), and KAFOs (leg braces that go up to the thighs).  He thinks Ramya will be a functional walker, and is hopeful we can go down to just AFOs (ankle braces) in the future.  He did say, though, that her left hip is likely out and will need surgery.  The x-ray showed that the front of the hip was mostly in, but it seemed the back of the hip was not.  We'll need more x-rays in the future to better asses this.  Madi's right hip is out, but he doesn't want to operate as she is a part-time walker.  Because he sees Ramya walking more, though, and causing more strain to that joint, he thinks she will need surgery.  Sigh.  He thankfully wants to wait until she's been here longer and is better adjusted, so at least that is good news.  At this point, we had missed Madi's occupational therapy, so we just went to the cafeteria to eat and relax.  The second we pull up in the parking lot all the kids get excited (even Ramya now), becuase they know PCH has scooby doo fruit snacks full of all kinds of nasty junk that mom wouldn't normally let them have.  It's the one time they get them, and they all love them, so we never leave the hospital without them.  Hey, if you have to go to the hospital for appointments all the time, there has to be a little perk, right?!?!?!?

Ramya's photo of Madi's glove balloon....

 

 



This morning Madi woke up early at 7:05.  She was throwing up and dry heaving, but was responding and seeming ok other than that.  She wasn't stopping the dry heaving, though, and then started staring off and getting slow to respond.  My heart skipped a beat.  Then I noticed her lower half started convulsing in a rhythmic pattern.  I woke David up, got her rescue meds, and gave her those (at about 7:20).  Madi's seizures don't self-resolve and just continue to get more involved, so they have to be stopped ASAP with a rescue med.  The problem, though, is that it's sometimes hard to tell if it's a seizure or just regular old sickies.  She normally falls asleep right after I give the meds, but this time she didn't.  She was agitated and kept telling me she needed to pee.  She finally fell asleep, but woke up very unhappy (which is not like her).  She kept saying her head hurt.  She'd hold it and just cry.  It broke my heart.  She started projectile vomiting, too.  She was lethargic and would wake up for a bit, sleep for a bit, but was just hurting and not happy whenever she was awake.  She's never complained of a headache before, and she's never acted like that after a seizure before, so we were worried about her shunt.  We decided to take her in to PCH.  Because they are on RSV restrictions still, my mom drove so I could sit next to Madi, and David stayed with Conner and Ramya.  Poor Conner was crying and upset at me leaving, and I felt awful leaving Ramya when we are still working on attachment so much.  Thankfully David was there for them, but it was not fun.  Madi projectile vomited in the car on the way again and was still saying her head hurt.  We got checked in at PCH and then the ordred a CT-scan and x-ray series.  I also told them they probably wanted to check her urine and did a clean cath sample for them.  We waited quite a bit (such is hospital life) and then it was time to go get the scans.  Right about then, Madi perked up and started acting like her normal self.  We went for the scans and then waited for the doctor to come talk to us.  While we waited we chatted with Conner and Ramya on facetime.  They were relieved to see us!  After we chatted for a bit, the doctor came in and told us her scans all came back fine.  He didn't think it was shunt related (Thank God!  I know it's crazy to wish a sickness on your kiddo, but I always pray she is "just sick" and it's not shunt related, because shunt issues equal surgery!).  He did, however, see a lot of white blood cells in her urine, indicating she likely has a UTI.  They couldn't get ahold of urology to check her sample, so they sent me home with a prescription for antibiotics and with instructions to fill it if urology felt it was necessary (I will call Dr. Zuniga on Monday and have him check it all out).  The doctor said the UTI could be to blame for all of the symptoms we saw that day.  I don't think it was related to the headache and vomiting.  I think that was likely due to the rescue meds.  I suppose you never know, though.  I do know if she has a UTI that would lower her seizure threshold, so that could help explain the seizure.  Madi acted like her normal happy self once we were home.  Conner and Ramya were thrilled to see us and Ramya would not let me put her down the rest of the day.  David said she cried and asked for me a few times while I was gone.  This made me feel very sad, but at the same time, I'm glad she is missing me.  I would think it would mean she's at least partially attached to me if she is sad I'm gone.  I'm glad she's now gotten to see, though, that momma comes back.  I'm also thankful she was able to be with David, as I'm sure that helped their bonding.

Sleeping angel on momma...

 

 



We finally got dinner (takeout... I hadn't had breakfast or lunch, and had finally gotten half a sandwich in the late afternoon but was still very hungry!) and got all the kids in bed, and then Madi puked again.  It was a lot.  It went on me, on the pillow, and on the bed, so we changed all of the sheets and the waterproof mattress cover, and I changed my clothes.  We got all the kids back in bed and settled again, and then finally off to sleep.  I'm beat, so I am headed to bed as well.  The house is a mess.  Their are dishes in the sink.  I need a shower.  But for right now, I don't care.  Sleep is going to come first.  I am VERY thankful that Madi's shunt looks good and that we were able to come home today.  God is really watching over my little gal!

I pray everyone has a blessed night and gets lots of rest (me included)!!!

 

It's Been a Month!

It still feels so surreal that Ramya is officially home and ours, FOREVER!  It is so crazy to think that it was barely over a month ago that I walked in to that orphanage and carried her out; what a great feeling that was!

Life is chugging along and things are going well.  I had prepared for the worst while praying for the best, and I feel like things are going much better than I had planned.  I'm not trying to say things have been easy, because I don't think adding a 3rd child to your family is ever an "easy" thing, but I am thankful that things are better than expected.

Ramya has come so far in this past month.  Her English is getting better, she is coming to me when she needs something, she can play for a little while with Conner and Madi happily, she is learning to do things like cry (she used to just kind of quietly sob if something happened but now she cries and wants comfort from me), and she is enjoying snuggles and kisses. 

I thought I'd share what a good day looks like and what a hard day looks like for us.  I'll start with the hard so I can end on a good note ;).

A hard day means that Ramya has a hard time with transitioning, hearing and accepting "no", following directions, and things like that.  She gets in her "funk", I get the look from her, and she just won't listen or come out of it.  Redirection doesn't work, attempting to talk through it (in a basic, simplified way) doesn't work, and it just downward spirals into needing a time-in.  Time-ins on a hard day are rough with her trying to hit me, taking off her clothes and throwing them at me, yelling, and all that fun stuff.  This can happen once or it can happen multiple times in a day.  Thankfully this doesn't happen often and the good times far far outweigh the hard ones!  Her "moments" are also slowly tapering off, and for that, I am grateful!  I pray often for God to give me patience and grace for all of my children, as I know I need those things myself quite often :).

A good day for us means that the kids get along pretty well.  Our day flows nicely, I get something accomplished, redirection works, and our days feel "normal".  If we do have a time-in, it's short lived and she follows our time-in rules.  On a good day, we don't have any place we have to be.  It's always nice when we can spend time in the house and don't have an appointment or somewhere to go.  We just kind of hunker down and enjoy playing and being together as a family.  These days are wonderful!

Conner is so happy to have Ramya home and often tells me how cute and funny she is and how he is so happy she's home.  He often talks about how much he loves her.  He will tell me it's more work having two sisters, but he also talks about how much he enjoys it.  Madi loves Ramya, though they are true sisters.  One minute they are playing nicely, the next minute someone has the other person's doll, but all-in-all, you can tell how much they love each other.  They take care of each other, want to feed each other, want to help wash each other's hair during bath time, and things like that.  It is very sweet to watch!

I know our journey has just begun and our road to attachment will be a long one, but it already feels like she has been in our family from the start.  We all love her very much!

 

On a wagon ride

 

At the Deer Valley Airport Restaurant

 

Asleep in momma's arms.... the first night she wanted to be rocked to sleep (she likes rocking, but normally likes to lay next to me to fall asleep and often likes to hold my hand)

 

 

 

A Crazy Testing and Happy Birthday Kinda Day

Today was a crazy day, but a nice day too.  We woke up, did our morning routine, worked on homeschooling, went for a walk, then it was off to the doctor for Ramya and I.  Madi's respite worker, Amy, came to help out with the other two squirrels for a bit while I was gone and before David got off work at two to take over.  First was an ultrasound, followed by an appointment with the urologist (more to come on that soon).  After that we hustled out a CT scan and x-ray series to check her shunt.  The last two tests are in preparation for her upcoming neurosurgeon appointment, where we will make sure all is well with her shunt.

There was some good news and some bad news at the urology appointment.  The good news is that her kidneys look good.  There were no abnormalities or anything found, and her kidneys seem to be working well.  The doctor said her mitrofanoff is open and working, but the reason I can't get anything out of it is because of her constant leaking.  Madi is cathed through the urethra (what I call the "normal" way, since it's normal to us ;)) four times a day.  She pretty much stays dry between cathings.  Her bladder is very slightly spastic, but mostly is not.  It grows on it's own little curve and holds a decent amount of liquid.  Ramya is a whole new story, though.  She leaks like crazy and I get almost nothing out because she leaks so much.  I feel like I constantly change her and she is constantly wet.  She seems to hold very very little urine.  For example, today I cathed her "the normal way" in the morning.  She was soaking wet and I got very little out.  I skipped her early afternoon cathing as I was trying to keep her full for her ultrasound.  I just changed her and left for the doctor.  I gave her tons of water, as she was supposed to drink a ton for the ultrasound.  When we got there, she was wet again, but the tech said there was almost nothing in her bladder.  We cathed her a little later so the doctor could try her mitrofanoff, and we got almost nothing out.  Apparently this isn't really what they like to see, as we can't really achieve "social continence" like that.  The urologist wants her to be on dithropan (which she was on in the orphanage) to see if we can get her leaking under control.  Madi had terrible reactions to dithropan and is doing fine without it, so we have kept her off and just monitor her closely.  Looks like Ramya seems to be one of those kiddos who needs it, though.  He said we also need to do a urodynamics study and a VCUG to see just how much she can hold, to see if her muscles are just too week to hold things in, and to see if she still has renal reflux (among a few other things). 

He's a little confused at the motrofanoff surgery she went through.  Normally they go in and attach part of the intestines (I think that's what he said ;)) to the bladder to help it not be spastic and also to help it hold more liquid (again, I think that's what he said, I am sure some of you out there can help me explain this a little better ;)).  He doesn't think that part was done, and he has no idea why they wouldn't do that part too.  He said he needs to do the other two studies, in addition to the reasons posted above, to help him figure out exactly what they did do, and why they did what they did.  Basically he's stumped and thinks she really needed that part of the surgery and will need another surgery since that part wasn't done.  Drat.  He's also stumped by her MACE surgery.  He said it isn't in the typical spot and he doesn't know why they put it where they did, or if it will even work right how they did it.  Double drat.  He's going to take a better look at that later, but said not to use it for now.

Ramya did well with all of the testing and I think it also helped our bonding.  I stayed close and held her hand during the tests, assuring her that they would not hurt.  She seemed to trust me and want me close, so that made my momma heart happy.  I, of course, carried her around the hospital for all of her testing and she sat on my lap while we waited.  She seemed to enjoy the one-on-one time, though it wasn't for a fun reason.  They also realized it was her birthday and let her pick a little gift.  She picked a Littlest Pet Shop set with a girl doll in vintage clothing and a spider pet with a vintage hat.  She was very excited about it all!  They also gave her a little snack (goldfish crackers and fruit snacks) which she was happy about.  Overall we were gone quite a bit, from about 11:45 am until about 5:30 pm. 

Poor Conner isn't doing well with having me gone so much.  He now has my cell phone number memorized and calls me a lot while I'm away.  I don't mind and happily take his calls when I can, because I know it helps him feel better.  Today was a call about a big scratch he found on his foot that he doesn't know how he got.  He thought I needed to know and would want to look at it when I got home.  I assured him I would examine it and kiss it when I returned home, and I did.  He called about 3 other times, but I was only able to answer 1 other time.  He played with Amy and Madi a bit, but mostly said he wanted alone time and sat in the garage.  When I got home he told me he prayed for God to bring me home faster :(.  Poor little guy.  He did have fun going to the movies with David, so that is good, but I think I'm going to have to figure out a little mommy/son date this weekend.  He is seeming to really need some time with me.

Now to the FUN part of our day!  After dinner (thank GOD for leftovers that came from amazing friends who have been gifting us with yummy food!!) we gave Ramya her presents from us and did cake.  I am the lamest mom ever and she got a piece of pre-made, individually sold, cake from the store.  She loved it, though, and, literally, devoured every single bite!  I am throwing a family party on Sunday that will be the princess and the frog theme, so she will get a nice birthday party soon.  I am thankful that she was happy with her little party this evening, though, since I felt like I didn't do a very good job celebrating.  She enjoyed being sung Happy Birthday so much that she started singing it to herself too!  She loved all her gifts, but especially loved her baby doll and the outfit for it.  I had purchased it for her at a little toy shop by our house that was going out of business and was clearancing everything out.  I've been saving it for her and I'm so glad she loved it!  Both she and the baby are happily sleeping in our bed as we speak :).  I'm not sure if she's ever had her birthday celebrated before, but I am thrilled that she was able to come home in time for us to celebrate her!

 

Opening gifts is so fun!

 

Sister, what did you get???

My favorite birthday gift!

 



 

We had to change the clothing right away ;)

 

Blowing out her candle (she didn't want to go to the table and wanted to stay sitting with her baby in her lap, so I complied ;))

 

Finger-licking-good!

 

 

Many people have asked how I'm doing, so I thought I'd just tell everyone at once.  If you see me, you will likely think I look tired.  It's for a great reason... I'm tired!  Ha!  I don't think I've slept amazingly for, say, 6 years or so (wait, how old is Conner again ;)).  It's more than that, though, (because actually my kiddos are pretty good sleepers, thankfully!!).  I'm just tired because our days are busier right now.  Even just being home is busier.  There is more holding and lifting and more emotional "stuff" lately.  There are more phone calls to figure out appointments and insurance and all that fun stuff in there too.  There are adoption reports due and meetings with our post-adoption agency.  There is lots of running around and appointments, though I put off anything I can.  Conner and Madi have regressed a little and are needing more momma time.  And, amongst all of that, there is the typical hustle and bustle of life and housework.  There is also time with my hubby, which is just so needed and important, and worth every second!  I am thankful, though, that being a mom, and especially a mom of a child with special needs who needs occasional ambulance rides and hospital stays, has well-prepared me for life's busyness.  I have this supernatural ability to run effectively on minimal sleep, to go abnormal amounts of time with no food, water, shower, bathroom, etc..., and be able to manage a household and retain information (mostly ;)) from the doctors.  I am, of course, exaggerating a bit, as really, I am taking pretty good care of myself.  I make sure to sleep 7-8 hours a night, eat healthy(ish... lately I've been not doing very good in this area) meals, exercise, and get some "me" time in once everyone else has gone to bed.  However, I am still drained.  A second cup of coffee in the afternoon (if Starbucks wasn't so expensive, I'd have a major addiction going on there) has become part of my new routine and keeps me going.  I have started biting my nails again and am back down to sad little stubs.  I am happy to say, though, that I am still going, mostly with a smile on my face, and that is what matters!

 

Another question I get a lot is how people can pray for us.  Here are some ways you can pray...

1. That we can find peace and joy amongst our doctors appointments and the things taking us out of the home
2. For Conner and Madi as they adjust to me being gone a little more (thankfully this should taper off a bit after we get over this first hump of appointments)
3. For our bonding and attachment as a family as we try to balance it all
4. For grace for ourselves, as well for all of our kiddos, as we travel this journey together
5. That we can get Ramya on long-term care

 I'm sure I have lots more, but I'm getting tired and can't think of them all right now!  I want to update everyone on how our attachment is going too, but that will just have to wait for another night :).  

 

Day ____ Home... Wait, What Day is it Anyway?!?!?

My days have gotten all mixed up, that's for sure!  In some ways, things still feel so very new, and in others, it feels like we have been a family of 5 all along.  We are getting down a routine and our new normal is starting to feel just, well, normal.  Conner informed me yesterday that things are back to normal, so I know the kids are feeling more in the "grove" too.  Both Conner and Madi are very excited to show off their new sister.  They are very proud of her!  It's crazy to me that I haven't even truly known Ramya a month now, but I am already so in love with her. 

We have our good moments and our not-so-good moments, but our good far outweigh the rough ones.  Today was a great day, and I wasn't so sure it would be, so I was pleasantly surprised.  We still haven't been back to Church, and were planning to go this week, but one of the kiddo's best friends, Viveka, was turning 5, and we really wanted to be at her party.  They are moving to India in a few weeks and we will miss them greatly.  I knew Church and the party would be way to much (and feared the party alone may be!), so we opted out of Church to spend some time with our friends before their move. 

Tomorrow Ramya has an appointment with the pediatrician to get her established there and to make sure she doesn't have anything yucky she has brought home from the orphanage (ring worm, lice, parasites, and all that fun stuff ;)).  We have a good amount of appointments coming up this next few weeks, so I am extra thankful for the meals that have been coming in from friends and family.  I know David appreciates something a little more fancy than eggs, Costco chicken apple sausages, and/or chicken, since I haven't been able to make nice dinners too often since we've been home.  We are getting there, though! 

In other news, I think Madi is allergic/sensitive to eggs :(.  Considering we are gluten and dairy free already (due to sensitivies), and considering eggs is one of the few protiens Madi loves to eat, I'm pretty bummed.  I had noticed Madi started getting a rash around her mouth, but kind of brushed it off.  I started noticing a pattern to it, though, and I'm about 99% sure it's eggs.  We get local, fresh, un-washed eggs, but we were out, so I bought some from the store on Tuesday.  Madi ate two scrambled that night (nothing added, just scrambled plain, no milk) and right away got very red and rashy all around the mouth.  That night she slept terrible.  I thought maybe it was something to do with those eggs in particular, and thought it would be fine when she had our local eggs back.  The next day our local eggs were delivered so I made her some.  Right away, she got very red and rashy around the mouth again.  I thought maybe, just maybe, it was from the catsup or something and just kind of kept it in the back of my mind.  She slept terrible again that night.  Yesterday I gave her a boiled egg (local eggs like she always eats) with nothing at all on it.  Sure enough, totally red all around the mouth, and last night she was up all nigh in pain.  And I do mean all night (yawn).  Darn.  I'm going to get her tested and hope to have some more "concrete" results soon. 

I realized I never posted our last batch of photos, so here you go (my mom has a few more on her camera I need to get off, but I haven't yet).  Better late than never, right??

 

 

Oh What a Day!

Whew, what a day!

I'm realizing that I have to pay super close attention to our schedule and changes, because what just feels normal and not busy to me, feels different to Ramya.  Today Madi went back to preschool for the first time since we have been back (they had Tuesday off for conferences and my mom brought her last Thursday).  When we dropped Madi off Ramya seemed ok, as well as during pick-ups, but of course, this meant a change to our routine.  Next we had a visitor that came by for a bit to spend time with us.  Ramya wanted to sit on her lap, because my kids were, but we decided she should set her next to her instead (more on this later) and that worked out.  She left and Madi's therapist came, which is the first therapist we have had in the house since we have been home (other than Madi's respite worker, Amy, but Amy has adopted children as well, so she knows just how to handle herself/situations to make sure that she is encouraging our attachment and bonding), and we also did a quick stop at the grocery store.  This was just wayyyyyyy too much for one day.  When the early evening came, so did the defiance.  We had lots of "no's" and some throwing of things, and then of course came the time-in, which lasted way longer than it should have due to more defiance.  After that was all said and done, the impulsiveness came out in full force.  She was in my arms and happy again, but was just having a hard time settling down and calming.  I did some deep pressure sensory input on her, we ate, and I massaged her with coconut oil, and she finally started relaxing.  After we got ready for bed, we had some more defiance and another time-in, and then finally got to bed, where it took her a while to fall asleep because she was still wound up.

Whew!!

On the plus side, today I was "mom" or "mommy" at least half of the day.  Woooo hooo!  David has mostly been "dad" for a few days now, but I was only getting an occasional mom or mommy from her.  Today, though, I got it quite a bit!  It's what my momma heart needed to still have a smile on my face at the end of today ;).

I also learned some interesting things on attachment today.  I wasn't sure how to handle the lap-sitting thing, as our visitor is someone close to us who she has seen before and who will be around often.  I know that she wanted to sit with her because Conner and Madi were, and because she is becoming familliar, but I also know this is pretty early and that we aren't ready yet.  We decided to have her sit next to her, instead of on her lap, and then to have our visitor ask her if she needed mommy.  It wasn't totally smooth, but it worked.

I thought I should ask around to see what people said about when it is ok to start letting her sit on other people's laps and to be held by people who are close and who are not strangers to us.  Basically the consensus was that there is no exact time, but that it will be a long time (like at least 6 months), and even after it's been a while, it should still be done conservatively.

The reasoning behind this is because she has had nothing but caregivers that come and go and has nothing but change after change (3 orphanages, multiple hospital stays, and her move to us).  She will see people that come, especially people in our family that are close and come often, as other caregivers that come and go, if we aren't careful about making sure that they don't hold her, feed her, have her sit on our laps, etc....  This, though, also makes it seem more like we are just one of many caregivers, instead of her PRIMARY caregivers/parents.  She's had almost 6 years of change, so she doesn't know what permanent feels like.  She also doesn't get friend vs caregiver or caregiver vs mom and dad, who or how to trust, etc...  Because Ramya is at a higher risk of attachment disorder due to all of the moves and changes in her life, we have to be even more vigilant and careful.  Sometimes this may feel awkward, and sometimes it may be hard,  but the chance of having long-term issues will be less if we are really careful now, so that's big and worth it!

Here are some good articles on attaching with children who are adopted:

Good general tips....  http://www.rainbowkids.com/expertarticledetails.aspx?id=29

On adopting older children... http://adoptivefamilies.com/articles.php?aid=1358

Tips for parents... http://e-magazine.adoption.com/articles/219/suggestions-for-parenting-the-older-adopted-child-with-attachment-issues.php


I am also learning that it is important for me to take better care of myself to be the momma I need to be to all 3 of my little ones.  For me, this means going to bed at an earlier time.  Before, I could go to bed at midnight or so, wake up at 7:30 or 7:45 with the kiddos, and feed great, even if I was woken up during the night.  Now, though, I have an extra one to wake me up at night, an extra one to wake me up early, and things just take longer and more energy.  I am totally ok with this, but I know it will be important to stay caught up on sleep, so my new goal is to be in bed by about 10:30 (9 more minutes before I have to go to bed... I better hurry!!), at least until the newness of this all has settled and the jet-lag is far behind me :).

Next week our doctor appointments start and I am excited to get a little more feedback on what we can do to help Ramya.  I'm so thankful we have a good team of doctors ready for her!


 

Day 3 Home: An Unplanned Adventure Out

I know I can't keep up blogging daily much longer, but I am trying to show a realistic picture of our lives to help out others who may be considering, or are in the process, of adopting.  I also like keeping our friends and family in the loops, since you guys have been walking our journey with us since the beginning.

I was a little worried about how today would go after our rough morning start.  Ramya had a hard time listening this morning.  Instead of time-outs, where we would separate ourselves from her, we do time-ins, where we stay close, when she just won't listen.  Well, we had to do about 3 of them this morning in a span of maybe 25 minutes.  We are working on accepting no and listening, and I know that is something that will just take a while.  I have to remind myself that Ramya may be 5, but emotionally, she is much younger.  When she's in "a mood", she will look right at me and do what I asked her not to, then gets really upset when she has to sit out (close to me).  It's nothing that surprises me at all and I know we'll continue to work through it, but that it will just take some time.  Heck, I still work on that with Conner and Madi too!

We all stayed home from Church together today to spend time as a family.  We went on a wagon walk together and she really loved it.  Conner, of course, got a little tired of walking, so we ended up with 3 in our wagon :).

 

 

At 2:00, I sent Conner and Madi off with David for a birthday party.  Turns out, the party wasn't until 4, so David came back.  While they were gone, I took Ramya to the grocery store and wore her in the Ergo while I shopped (she's been asking to be worn in the front, not the back, she knows just what she wants!!).  We got what we needed and came home, but she asked about Conner and Madi the entire time.  She was VERY excited when they came home.  We played outside a bit with the neighbor kiddos and Ramya loved the battery-operated princess car.  Madi rode her Amtryke (we have one for Ramya too, it just needs the bolts put in it), and Conner rode his bike with the neighbor boy.

 

 

(Don't ask me about Conner's outfit.  That kid's got a style all of his own, but I love it!)

 



 

 

It came time for the kids and David to leave again, and we decided to just all go as a family and hope for the best, with the understanding that 1- I would hold her or sit by her the whole time, 2- We wouldn't have anyone else hold her, and 3- We may have to take her out and sit in the car with her or just leave and head home early.  We talked to Conner and Madi and let them know we were going as a family but that we may have to leave early, and they were fine with that.  Ramya was quiet, but quite curious during the party.  She was in my arms or on my lap the majority of the time.  The only time she left was to crawl off and get a toy, but she brought it back and sat with me while she played with it.  She really enjoyed the spaghetti, meatballs, and bread.  She ate a whole plate full!  Towards the end she asked to go outside and started getting a little cranky so we headed out.  Overall she did really well though!  It was nice to get out as a family and relax with friends.  I asked her if she had fun with her friends and she gave me a big smile and nodded her head "yes".  She is very social and enjoys being around other people. 

 

So far sleep has been pretty good.  Conner and Madi wanted to sleep with me when I got home because they had missed me, and I wanted to sleep close to Ramya for bonding, so right now we are sharing a bed.  They also really wanted to sleep next to Ramya.  Pretty soon Conner and Madi will head back to their beds but likely I will have Ramya stay next to me, if she will (she loves sleeping with Conner and Madi).  David and I have been catching up on our date-nights-in and are enjoying them.  We know it will be quite a while before we are ready to have a date-night out again and we are fine with that, but it's still nice to relax and watch a movie together or play a game or whatever.   

 

 

We are getting in to a little routine and that's always nice.  My house is still needing lots of attention, as I spend a lot of time one-handed still, but it'll get there.

 

Tonight I am thanking God for all 3 of my little blessings, whom I love so very much!  It is wonderful having them all together and watching them laugh together!